Tickle the Pickle

It’s here! The day I’ve been dreading since I first found out I was baking a baby boy in my belly.

My son has learned how to tickle his pickle.

C-R-A-P.

Every time (and I mean EVERY time) that dang diaper comes off, it’s like a moth to a flame. Coop can’t keep his hands from wandering down south to check out his new, umm, toy.

Having zero experience with little boys (except the toddlers I babysat in high school, in which, thankfully, this was never an issue) I am torn as to what to do. Do I move his hand away? Do I let him do his thing? Do I distract him with something else to — ahem — play with?

The last thing I want to do is give the kid a complex!!! I know this is a completely natural progression is self discovery, like when he figured out he had feet and became OBSESSED with trying to get them in his mouth (oh, shit!). My logical side knows this to be true … every other part of me is completely ooged out.

I believe God, in his infinite wisdom, designed it so that baby boys would start the pickle tickle very early so that moms could gradually adjust. This way, she doesn't go all Linda Blair by the time the boys start spending waaaay too much time in the bathroom.