get low

Hello, my name is Tessa and I am the whitest, most rhythmically challenged, tone-def, off-key, flat-booty mama on the planet.

But that doesn’t stop me from having a melodic love affair with Flo Rida and his dirrrrty lil’ clothes-obsessed ditty, “low”.

Um, hello, don’t all good mommies sing to their wee ones? Right now I, apparently, happen to prefer naughty little rap tunes to say, oh, I don’t know, Old MacDonald Had a Farm.

I’m not usually drawn to songs with phrases like “Sorry but I had to fold her, like a pornography poster,” but for some reason, I luuuv this song.

But, no worries, I only belt out the clean version for Coop (mostly cause that’s the only part I can ever remember). That, and I’d hate for his first string of words to be, “Lil mama took my cash …”

So, I stick to:
Apple Bottom Jeans
Boots with the fur
The whole club was lookin at her
She hit the flo
Next thing you know
Shawty got low low low low low low low low

Them baggy sweat pants and the Reeboks with the straps
She turned around and gave that big booty a slap
She hit the flo
Next thing you know
Shawty got low low low low low low low low

Don’t judge, you know you've been singing booty-shaking tunes to your tot ever since Ross and Rachel belted out "Baby Got Back" to little Emma. =)